Happy Wives, Happier Marriages?

HAPPY WIVES, HAPPIER MARRIAGES

Study suggests joy of marriage may be contagious

A happy wife makes a happy marriage.

So says Mel Prince, a Southern Connecticut State University marketing professor who recently completed a study examining job and life satisfaction among 86 working, married couples.

Wives, Prince's research found, wield more influence than husbands in determining the happiness of a marriage.

It comes as little surprise to some greater Waterbury women -- several of whom already believed they had more bearing on their relationships than men might like to let on.

Prince's advice to women: "Make yourself happy. That will naturally infuse itself to your husband. Happiness radiates in marriage. So does unhappiness."

And by happy, he does not mean just within the relationship, but an overall contentment in life.

It works like this: if a wife is happy, that happiness can have what Prince calls a crossover, or contagion, effect. Yep, husbands can catch happiness.

To Dawn Schuster, who spends most days listening to details of women's --and sometimes men's -- lives as a stylist in her Naugatuck salon, Savoir Hair, Prince's findings seemed right on.

"We kind of organize their lives," the mother of two said, joking of her own other half: "Bill doesn't know where the toilet paper is (stored)." Echoed Diane Wachtel, another stylist: "I think men just seem to go with the flow most of the time."

Both ladies agreed that, based on their observations and interactions with other women, wives' attitudes can have a "huge" difference on a relationship's dynamics.

But before women start relishing their roles as rulers of their households' happiness, Prince cautioned: the balance is only slightly skewed in females' favor. Women's influence on wedded bliss is about 10 percent greater than men's, he estimated.

Of course, there are other factors that can influence a marriage, regardless of how fulfilled, happy or even Pollyanna-ish a woman may be.

"You could have a difficult husband," said Prince, offering financial and health problems as other, sometimes insurmountable obstacles to a joyous union.

Prince hypothesized that women wield this greater influence because they are more in touch with their feelings than men, and better able to articulate and express those feelings.

But at least two women, both of whom had been married for several decades, had different perspectives.

"In our case it's probably equal," said Ruth Braziel, of Naugatuck, pondering who could take credit for the happiness of her 52-year marriage. Then she amended her answer: "It's my husband, because he's the greatest --great sense of humor, great father -- the perfect idea of a husband."

A half-century, five children, 13 grandchildren and two great-grandchildren later, the Braziels still have a regular date night, said Braziel, bragging: "We're really proud of our marriage."

Prince's latest research, which typically encompasses sociology, psychology and advertising, evolved from studies of employees' responses to work environments and job satisfaction.

The study reaffirmed some widely held perceptions, such as the way men are driven by power, pay and status. But women regarded enjoyment of their work and a sense of accomplishment as more satisfying than salary.

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